Motivation
Right now it feels like I'm in between two places in my life: Winter depression and Spring happiness. It's like being depressed but in a really good mood. It's weird and confusing as fuck. But I kinda like it, cause it means things are changing for the better.
I have lost all my motivation to have healthy lifestyle right now and I think that might be one of the reasons I feel a bit depressed. I am constantly tired and that makes it hard to find the motivation to go to the gym and since I'm "All-in or nothing", right now it's "Nothing". This morning, as I was walking from the bus to the office, I felt like this was gonna be a shitty day and I almost decided to go and get something unhealthy to eat right away. When I was standing in front of the vending machine I changed my mind...
On the other hand, I am so motivated for other things. I can't wait for spring and when it's time for me to start growing things in my own backyard. My plants are my babies and I love watching them grow up, until I eventually eat them. (No, I will not do the same when I have kids)
I feel motivated to get rid of shit I don't need and maybe making some money out of it. I hate throwing things away that are not broken, that's why I feel better if I give them away or sell them. I easily get emotionally attached to things and find it hard to get rid of them: "Oh, but I got this from XXXX, it would feel wrong to throw it away", "I know this top is way too small for me now but I bought it in Spain that time....", "This reminds me of XXXXX, so I have to keep it"...
I usually feel very creative during spring. I love creating things but unfortunately I don't take the time to do all the things I want to do. If only I had more free time to do them...
